I’ve been swamped with studying, trips and helping others recently. In fact I’ve been helping others too much recently. It’s time I learned to say “no”. I’m missing out on all the things I love (design, music, Karate, running). So those things will now become promises and I’ll feel less stressed.

Last Saturday I went skiing for the first time. It was pretty exciting and I really enjoyed it. The snow was really icy though, so it wasn’t great to ski on (or so I’m told). It’s better when it’s more powder like. I got the hang of it pretty quickly and soon started moving away from making “A” shapes with my skis. Hopefully I’ll go again next month.

Tomorrow will be hard. I’ll have to communicate a lot. After class I have to quickly grab lunch and then I’m being matched to a regular Korean student for a language exchange. Tomorrow I basically meet them, exchange numbers and work out a schedule. After that I have to meet another girl for a language exchange and for her to introduce me to some of her friends. I didn’t expect that because a couple hours later I need to get across Seoul for another promise. So I’ll be rushing a lot and have no time to do any homework but it’s better to be busy than bored.

I had exams recently to decide what course the University wanted to put me on. I went in the room feeling very unprepared and overcome with nerves. I try to stop those nerves but they always grasp me and won’t let go until they are satisfied they have impaired me enough. However, I quickly changed attitude in the exam. I felt like giving up. Before the speaking exam started the teacher left the exam on my table. I thought it was like a hint sheet since this is like some sort of placement exam. However, it was the actual exam and my heart sank, the vocabulary was none of what I studied over the break. It was vocab from the exams I had already passed and some stuff I had no chance with. The teacher realised her mistake and took the sheet away from me. So there was the reason to give up, I walked in and opened my mouth. Korean quickly started pouring out saying I’m going to find this difficult so why not just place me on the lower course right now. The teacher looked shocked. I thought at first it was because I was giving up so easily but after the exam the true reason came to light. I’ll get to that soon. So the exam. With my negative attitude my nerves had gone and I was answering every question she threw at me with a lower speech form than the usual over the top form we use in class. Before I knew it the exam was over and I went out not thinking anything of it but feeling a little bad for giving up. The results day soon came, I looked for my name on the lower course. I wasn’t there. I thought maybe I had to repeat last term so I looked on that list. Again not there. I went to the fast course list and there I was in a good class. The teacher didn’t understand why I wanted to go on the slow course when my everyday Korean was apparently very good. It seems in the exam I answered the questions mostly correctly and had a good use of the more advanced grammar. My Korean is good enough for the better class and the lower form of speech I was using is a little above “friend speech” but it was the level the teacher wanted me to show a good use of. So then I had to question myself. Why did I feel like giving up? I think I found that answer. Over the holidays most people I knew went home for holidays. I mean the ones I spoke English to everyday. The people left here were not so good at English and we tended to speak Korean when we could. When I travelled I was speaking Korean a lot to this one guy too. After I was mostly hanging out with Korean natives and realised my Korean was far away from the level I want to achieve and I think that’s what disheartened me into thinking I wasn’t prepared.

Class started this week and I’m coping well with the speed of the course. I’m studying everyday after class by completing all the homework, writing a diary in Korean and previewing material for the following lesson. I’ve established my problem is vocabulary and I am thinking of ways to improve that. I’m quickly falling into a routine too. This means my free time will come back and I can finally design more. I’ve missed design so much. Hopefully I’ll have a little more time to train too. I want to run more often. Hopefully this term I can mould myself into a very productive person and achieve my goals.

I’m seriously struggling to sleep here recently. I had jet-lag which was then disrupted further by a some good-bye parties and some clubs. So I was sleeping in two hour bursts here and there. Now when I go to sleep I wake up after an hour or two and cannot fall back asleep until around 6am. Sleeping like that is okay this week since there isn’t really any classes but next week I’ll be in everyday from 9am. Right now I’m thinking the thing to do is to stay up for two days and fall asleep on the second night. Then sleep at the same time the following night. I guess though, I can save myself that bother because I’ll maybe quickly fall into a decent sleep routine with classes starting.

Yesterday I went to the ATM machine I always use in the local subway station but it was switched off. So I headed to the next subway station as there are international ATMs in most stations. However, that one was switched off too. I soon received a text from a friend saying that he too couldn’t find one that was working. So this morning I did some research online for international ATMs. I found some locations. They were all pretty far from here though but I was desperate for money by now so had to accept the mission. My friend came too. The first few locations the machines were also switched off but at one location (which happened to be a tourist centre) a lady came over and helped us. She showed us a map of where to go to find a working machine. We followed the directions, entered the place and couldn’t find the machine but by luck again, a security guard asked me what I was looking for and I told him. He then took me to a working machine. The relief was immense. I can buy food now!

Tonight I went on a date. The communication was so hard. She spoke next to no English. I was relying on my Korean to get me through it. It was okay but my verb vocabulary is seriously lacking. My electronic dictionary saved the day though. We ended up talking for 5 hours over dinner and coffee. It was fun and I’ll definitely see her again. She kept saying that she was scared of the communication and didn’t want me to feel uncomfortable. She kept calling herself stupid when she couldn’t remember English words. I built her back up though and hopefully she won’t worry so much about me getting uncomfortable.

Oh yeah the image is of a group of young American boys running through the University park. It was so random. Why were such young Americans in Korea in our University? Still they were nice enough and yelled “Hello” as they swiftly passed by.

I haven’t wrote about music for a long time. 2005 had some great moments though, especially some of the live gigs in South Wales. I recently submitted my Japanese top 5 for keikaku.net though. This is that list:

Bugy Craxone - Bugy Craxone
A strong release from Bugy Craxone. I was expecting one of their best releases but was pleasantly surprised. Intelligent guitar playing and solid songs make this for me. The sometimes strange English lyrics can be forgiven.

Advantage Lucy - Echo Park
Advantage Lucy continue to impress with their well thought out catchy pop songs. Aiko’s voice is as captivating as ever.

toddle - I dedicate D chord
Somewhat difficult to listen to at first but soon became a favourite for me this year. The positive energy passed over as I listened to this album made it that much more special.

銀杏BOYZ - DOOR
A loud and passionate release from Ging Nang Boyz guaranteed them space on my playlists. Surprisingly good considering they released two albums this year.

Hawaiian6 - Beginnings
When I heard about Beginnings being released I was hoping for more of their solid, catchy sound and they delivered superbly. There are few moments where they go wrong on this release.

Be sure to check out the full article featuring the rest of the staff’s top fives. Go>

Welcome to 2006. It’s that time of year where we say we will change and become a better person by making resolutions. If I make some this year then maybe they’ll be to study harder and design more. I think maybe that means I need to organise my time. So that’s what I will do.

So last night. I went to an area in Seoul called Jeong Kak and watched a concert featuring a bunch of Korean artists I have listened to. Then at midnight a big bell was rang to welcome the new year. It also means my age in Korea goes up by one. So here I am 25 even though I am really only 23. The street with the bell was rammed with people and many people were firing fireworks into the sky. You’d expect many accidents but the tubes that fired the fireworks were very safe and as long as you held them over head it was fine. After that and a sneaky escape of the crowds via some back alleys and some more sneak tactics of catching the subway before the crowds caught up, we headed to the club area and hit up a dance club. It was way too full but we had some fun. All in all a decent night.

Today I went to church for the first time in a long time. I went to a different Christian church as opposed to the usual catholic service I used to attend. It was more new age and filled with many young people. The service was purely in Korean. I had no chance understanding the sermon but could sing along to the songs as there were subtitles on the screen. Most of the service is in song from. A live band plays and you sing with them. In front of the band there are dancers. It was more fun than a catholic service to be honest. Many people introduced themselves to me and I couldn’t make time for everyone as too many people were talking to me at once. I guess that comes from being the only foreigner in the church. Also, to introduce me they asked me to stand up and played me a song. It blesses me or something. I’ll probably go again next week. I should nap now, eat, study then sleep. See I’m organising my time already.